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Good? Generous? or Just Afraid!

Lots of things happen when you are sick. First thing you learn is the importance of your parents or spouse. All their care taking brings out the love they have in their heart for you. You realise what would you do without them, how nice as a person they are. But parents or spouse or friends ain't the only people who become good.

It is was myself who became a better person when I suffered from a 3 week long typhoid. During that period that is. As a believer of Jainism, which says what is happening to you is the result of your past deeds (good or bad) and what takes place in the future is determined by what your current deeds are, the first thought to come to my mind was that of tit-for-tat. I must have given pain to someone and thus I am at the recieving end now. This started a chain of thought processes.

You think of all the pain you have caused to your parents by your immature and childish behaviour. You pledge to relieve them of daily chores by helping them. You feel that, god cannot be present everywhere all the time, so he created mother. You think of not harming any creature in the world. Take another vow of doing good deeds from now on, of not wasting your time. You realise health being wealth. Just you wait, the day I start feeling well, I will strive to be a better person. A reformed human being.

How good a person I had become when I had been ill. How generously did I shower kind feelings on everyone. How quickly did I shoot a smile. Everybody seemed so nice and caring. Gosh! Did I really learn the meaning of "what you sow is what you get".

On second thoughts i.e. after getting well, was I really a good person then? Maybe I was afraid. But of what? Afraid just at the thought of suffering again. By promising to be good I was, er.., in a way bribing god ;-) But whatever be the reason to be good, it is always a win-win option. I agree that I may not be as good as I had promised but even a little amount of goodness is a bonus to derive out of an illness.

Since then I truly feel for the terminally and seriously ill.